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alkisah di Arab untuk pertama kalinya dibuka Butik Lingerie

lilolintang — Thu, 25 Mar 2010 14:57:46 +0000

this is what happened on opening;

Inglish translaishion

lilolintang — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 21:58:44 +0000

Read them carefully and you’ll understand a foreign language

Are you harboring a fugitive- Hu Yu Hai Ding

See me A.S.A.P. – Kum Hia Nao

Small Horse – Tai Ni Po Ni

Your price is too high – No Bai Dam Thing

Did you go to the beach – Wai Yu So Tan

I bumped into a coffee table – Ai Bang Mai Ni

I think you need a facelift – Chin Tu Fat

It’s very dark in here – Wai So Dim?

Has your flight been delayed? – Hao Long Wei Ting

That was an unauthorized execution.- Lin Ching

I thought you were on a diet – Wai Yu Mun Ching?

This is a tow away zone. – No Pah King

You are not very bright – Yu So Dum

I got this for free – Ai No Pei

I am not guilty – Wai Hang Mi?

Please, stay a while longer – Wai Go Nao?

Our meeting was scheduled for next week – Wai Yu Kum Nao

They have arrived – Hia Dei Kum

Stay out of sight – Lei Lo

He’s cleaning his automobile – Wa Shing Ka

Does this bathroom stink! Hu Flung Dung?

———————————-

A bus stops and 2 men get on. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation.

The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of them say the following:

‘Emma come first.
Den I come.
Den two asses come together.
I come once-a-more! .
Two asses, they come together again.
I come again and pee twice.
Then I come one lasta time.’

The lady can’t take this any more,

‘You foul-mouthed sex obsessed pig,’ she retorted indignantly.

‘In this country. we don’t speak aloud in Public places about our sex lives.

‘Hey, coola down lady,’ said the man.

‘Who talkin’abouta sex? I’m a justa tellin’ my frienda how to spell ‘ Mississippi ‘.’

$5.00 says you’re gonna read this again! : )

—————————————————

10 Things To Do At a Wal-Mart

—————————–

Japanese scientists have created a camera with a shutter speed so fast, they can now photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

A boy asks his granny, “Have you seen my pills, they were labelled LSD?”

Granny replies, “F@ck the pills, have you seen the dragons in the kitchen?!”

Little Billy asks his dad for a telly in his room. Dad reluctantly agrees.
Next day Billy comes downstairs and asks, “Dad, what’s love juice?”
Dad looks horrified and tells Billy all about sex.
Billy just sat there with his mouth open in amazement.
Dad says, “So what were you watching?”
Billy says, ” Wimbledon .”

A woman standing nude in front of a mirror, says to her husband, “I look
horrible, I feel fat & ugly, pay me a compliment.”
He replies, “Your eyesight is perfect.”

Wife gets naked & asks hubby, “What turns you on more, my pretty face or my sexy body?”
Hubby looks her up & down and replies, “Your sense of humour!”

An elderly couple is attending Mass.
About halfway through, the wife leans over and says to her husband, ‘I just let out a silent fart; what do you think I should do?’
He replies, ‘Put a new battery in your hearing aid

————————————

Larry gets home late one night and his wife, Linda, says, “Where in the
hell have you been”?

Larry replies, “I was out getting a tattoo”.

A tattoo?” she frowned. “What kind of tattoo did you get?”

I got 2 x $50 notes on my ~censored~,” he said proudly.

“What the hell were you thinking”? she said, shaking her head in
disdain.

“Why on earth would an accountant get a hundred dollar’s tattooed on his
privates?”

“Well, one, I like to watch my money grow.

Two, once in a while I like to play with my money.

Three, I like how money feels in my hand.

And, lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here
at home and blow a hundred dollars anytime you want”.

—————————————–

5 Hilarius Gadgets! :D

lilolintang — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 14:28:10 +0000

Instant Macho Necklaces

If you are not men enough, let Solo Man Bib turn you into one.

“The Solo Man Bib is a hilarious ad campaign by Solo, the real man thirst crusher, that invites men to go back to being REAL men. Solo is an Australian carbonated lemon-flavored soft drink manufactured by Cadbury Schweppes. The Solo Man Bib was designed exclusively for the Australian international twenty/20 cricket series.”

The Moby ~censored~ Realistic Whale Dildo

Taking a look at this 13″ beast should make you realize that you’re not getting an average dildo.

This dildo is an anatomically correct mold of an actual whale’s penis. What that means for you is a large ~censored~ and a nice sexual challenge to see if you can take in all of it. It tapers from 3.5″ in width at the base to 1.5″ in width at the head. This penis is made of phthalate-free jelly rubber material.

Break Glass In Case of a Sexual Emergency

You never know when your lame come-ons might actually impress some extremely drunk woman in a bar, which is why this Emergency Fire Alarm Condom Holder can give you peace of mind. Just break the “PRESS HERE” plastic plate when an emergency strikes. Reinstallation of the plate is easy too—just in case a miracle occurs and you get lucky twice.

Penis reduction pills

This is marketing genius. Buy a prominently-labeled bottle of Penis Reduction Pills and make sure you leave them in a place in your home where everyone can see them. Hell, leave them on your desk at work!

Fruit Juice Packaging by Naoto Fukasawa

Japanese industrial designer Naoto Fukasawa has created a series of creative fruit juice packages that have the look and feel of the fruit they contain.

“I imagined that if the surface of the package imitated the colour and texture of the fruit skin, then the object would reproduce the feeling of the real skin.”

Alongside banana, strawberry and kiwi fruit “juice skins” Naoto Fukasawa also offers a wild card “silken tofu skin” for a carton of soya milk.

funny gif files ..

lilolintang — Mon, 29 Jun 2009 08:37:05 +0000

I just realize why sneezing is not polite ..

Dedicated for person who addict to smoking .. no worries, I was smoker either ..

Maybe this is the perfect definition of frustration by .. you .. wkwkwkw

dirty joke .. but funny :D

lilolintang — Sun, 28 Jun 2009 14:47:33 +0000

There was an elderly man who wanted to make his younger wife pregnant. So, he went to the doctor to have a sperm count done. The doctor told him to take a specimen cup home, fill it, and bring it back the next day. The elderly man came back the next day and the specimen cup was empty and the lid was on it. Doctor: What was the problem? Elderly man: Well, you I tried with my right hand…nothing. So, I tried with my left hand…nothing. My wife tried with her right hand…nothing. Her left hand…nothing. Her mouth…nothing. Then my wife’s friend tried. Right hand, left hand, mouth….still nothing. Doctor: Wait a minute. You mean your wife’s friend too?! Elderly man: Yeah, and we still couldn’t get the lid off of the specimen cup.

——————————————————————————–

A guy walks into a sperm donor bank wearing a ski mask and holding a gun. He goes up to the nurse and demands her to open the sperm bank vault. She says “But sir, its just a sperm bank!”, “I don’t care, open it now!!!” he replies. So she opens the door to the vault and inside are all the sperm samples. The guy says “Take one of those sperm samples and drink it!”, she looks at him “BUT, they are sperm samples???” , “DO IT!”. So the nurse sucks it back. “That one there, drink that one as well.”, so the nurse drinks that one as well. Finally after 4 samples the man takes off his ski mask and says, “See honey – its not that hard.”

——————————————————————————–

There are four kinds of sex :

HOUSE SEX – When you are newly married and have sex all over the house in every room.

BEDROOM SEX – After you have been married for a while, you only have sex in the bedroom.

HALL SEX – After you’ve been married for many, many years you just pass each other in the hall and say “FUCK YOU”

COURTROOM SEX – When your wife and her lawyer fuck you in the divorce court in front of many people for every penny you’ve got.

——————————————————————————–

This beautiful woman one day walks into a doctors office and the doctor is bowled over by how stunningly awesome she is. All his professionallism goes right out the window…

He tells her to take her pants, she does, and he starts rubbing her thighs.

“Do you know what I am doing?” asks the doctor?

“Yes, checking for abnormalities.” she replies.

He tells her to take off her shirt and bra, she takes them off. The doctor begins rubbing her breasts and asks, “Do you know what I am doing now?”, she replies, “Yes, checking for cancer.”

Finally, he tells her to take off her panties, lays her on the table, gets on top of her and starts having sex with her. He says to her, “Do you know what I am doing now?”

She replies, “Yes, getting herpies – thats why I am here!”

——————————————————————————–

This couple were in bed getting busy when the girl places the guys hand onto her pussy. “Put your finger in me…” she asks him. So he does without hesitation, as she starts moaning. “Put two fingers in…”, she says. So in goes another one. She’s really starting to get worked up when she says, “Put your whole hand in!”. The guy’s like, “Ok!”. So he has his entire hand in, when she says moaning aloud “Put both your hands inside of me!!!”. So the guy puts both of his hands in! “Now clap your hands…” commands the girl. “I can’t”, says the guy. The girl looks at him and says “See, I told you I had a tight pussy!”.

——————————————————————————–

A dog, a cat, and a penis are sitting around a camp fire one night. The dog says, “My life sucks, my master makes me do my business on a fire hydrent!”. The cat says, “I don’t think so, my master makes me do my business in a box of cat litter.” The penis outraged, says “At least your master doesn’t put a bag over your head and make you do push ups until you throw up!”

——————————————————————————–

A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 15 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says, “Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!”. The woman says, “Me too, you’ve been eating grass for the past ten minutes!”

——————————————————————————–

A couple just got married and on the night of their honeymoon before passionate love, the wife tells the husband, “Please be gentile, I’m still a virgin.” The husband being shocked, replied, “How’s this possible? You’ve been married three times before.” The wife responds, “Well, my first husband was a gynecologist and all he wanted to do was look at it. My second husband was a psychiatrist and all he wanted to do was talk about it. Finally, my third husband was a stamp collector and all he wanted to do was…oh, do I miss him!”

——————————————————————————–

On their first night together, a newlywed couple go to change. The new bride comes out of the bathroom showered and wearing a beautiful robe. The proud husband says, “My dear, we are married now, you can open your robe.” The beautiful young woman opens her robe, and he is astonished.”Oh, oh, aaaahhh,” he exclaims, “My God you are so beautiful, let me take your picture. Puzzled she asks, “My picture?” He answers, “Yes my dear, so I can carry your beauty next to my heart forever”.

She smiles and he takes her picture, and then he heads into the bathroom to shower. He comes out wearing his robe and the new wife asks, “Why do you wear a robe? We are married now.” At that the man opens his robe and she exclaims, “oh, OH, OH MY, let me get a picture”. He beams and asks why and she answers, “So I can get it enlarged!”

——————————————————————————–

sweetsoysauce.com » joke

alkisah di Arab untuk pertama kalinya dibuka Butik Lingerie

Inglish translaishion

5 Hilarius Gadgets! :D

funny gif files ..

dirty joke .. but funny :D

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